Antsy pants

5/10

Day 14

Mile 229

Hiked about 20 miles today. Took a long break at this desert oasis called white water preserve. It was pretty magical deccending into this creek oasis land. Trees and wind and water. Photos will capture it more than my tired words. 

The evening concluded with a sunset walk through an epic canyon with a creek. So gorgeous, all the colors and sounds. My feet and ankles are sore for sure. Good night, and happy Mother's Day to you and yo mamma! 

5/11

Day 15

Mile 247

About 18 miles today. 

Lazy breaks make me antsy. For my sanity I had to leave friends who were taking many a chill break because I like to arrive at a desirable camp spot just as all the sunlight disappears. I am not a night hiker. My nights are sacred... For eating a Hearty late dinner and getting cozy in my bag. Except I think when I get into the Mohave desert I'll be needing to hike at night while it's cooler. 

Like everything that comes full circle, today is one for the books. I just set up my cowboy camp bed and made dinner. Called my mom, It's Mother's Day. I wanted to touch base. I ended up getting very frustrated on the phone because she was asking me questions like "what's new, what's tomorrow going to be like, who are you with now?" Well these questions are very easy to answer in the front country, but out here there are no answers but "I'm eating pistachio pudding with brownie bark for dessert right now... I won't know what tomorrow will look like until I arrive (which I am doing constantly), and I'm with me myself and I currently. These questions brought up a lot of emotion... That is hard to explain. I am living among the elements, walking and breathing all day, watching the scene change with every step I take, corner I round, and with every uphil and down hill. My mom asked me what it is I think about out here... Well I am mainly feeling and simply being... just enjoying the living crap out of my world, internally and externally. It's a constant walking meditation. Yes it is challenging to be walking 20 miles every day in sometimes very uncomfortable temperatures and when your body or your mind wants to give up. When my mom told me that this experience will be one I can teach kids about who I am therapeutically assisting, I just about lost it. Can we please not talk about the future?! I have enough desires for my future as it is. I don't need anyone trying to create a reality for me. I am yelling into a phone on a mountain. This is awkward. But she was coming from a caring place. I am grateful for my mom pushing my buttons in this way. Here I go just freaking out because I am on the phone in the wilderness... And that is uncomfortable in and of itself. 

Then it occurred to me these feelings I am having are directly related to a person I met today on trail. By mission creek, there was a hiker I hadn't seen before. She was a southbound section hiker. Around 65 years old. Named "River." Before I reached her, she was talking to my friend and hiking partner for today, Moonshine. She was telling us about her meditation she's living... She is finally accepting that who she is out here and who she is at home are two very different lives and worlds that cannot be combined. This saddened me, because I have been so in love with this world I want to bring it back with me whenever I am in "civilization". So I explained to my mom about this woman River I met today and that this is why I am frustrated. I don't like talking on the phone out here to people who don't know what it is like. I don't talk about my life in the front country out here. Two different worlds. Sadly. Words can't describe other than in poetry. So I will end my rant. Sorry no poem. 

5/12

Mile 266

10% of the pct! Daunting and exciting all at once. Hiked 19 miles. Made it to highway 18 to BIG BEAR CITY! Weeee :) got to town and was met by rock ocean and his awesome van- after getting a soda from the cache at the end of the day, he offered me a beer. I was so beat and so happy to be sitting on my pack. He took moonshine and I to pine knot campsite, right under the snow summit ski resort. Camped there for free and made a fire. 

5/13

Day 16

Walked into town about a mile and was super excited for food! Oh the possibilities. We walked to the hostel, running into a new friend Neon. When we got to the hostel, the keeper, Sarge convinced moonshine and I to "work stay." So were staying for free and helping out around the house- making sure the bathrooms are stocked and the trash is taken out. Showered and laundry! Soooo clean! Wore loaner clothes for the day- jeans and a sequence pink tank top- it felt funny and nice to look like a non hiker. Had a Mexican burrito and big ole margarita for lunch :) my favorite. Went to the grocery to resupply. Chilling at the hostel with some good people. Movie watching is in the plans for the night. Mmm I love couch. 

Sierra, myself, tink, smokey, ninja.